


Hold On Tight, You Know She's a Little Bit Dangerous

by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (2011)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Assassins, Established Relationship, F/F, Femslash, Identity Reveal, Kidnapping, Ridiculousness, Romance, Secret Identity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-08-04
Packaged: 2018-02-09 19:30:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1995129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/pseuds/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Girl meets girl. Girl falls for girl. Girl discovers that girl is an internationally-wanted assassin. Things get complicated.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the movie _D.E.B.S._ the other day, and wanted to write ridiculous femslash afterwards. Natasha/Darcy is actually one of my favourite pairings, so it's silly that I haven't actually written any before. The title is, of course, from the Roxette song 'Dangerous.'
> 
> Takes place after the first Thor movie, in a universe where Natasha never joined SHIELD.

**Chapter One**

While it was nice and all that SHIELD had offered to hire Darcy as Jane’s assistant once her internship was over and Darcy had graduated, in the end, Darcy had turned the offer down, because one, there was only so much science Darcy could take and after her internship she was pretty much scienced-out, and two, Darcy was pretty sure that working for the Men In Black would only lead to trouble.

Darcy was smart enough to know that information about the Einstein-Whatever Bridge was something a lot of people would want (especially if they found out that real live aliens were using it to travel around the galaxy and occasionally exile people to Earth), and while SHIELD might consider the assistant position to be low-risk by their standards, Darcy wasn’t sure she was cut-out for any cloak-and-dagger stuff, not on that low a salary. If she’d been doing something she really wanted to do, then maybe she would have agreed, but as it was, the assistant job seemed like it was taking a risk to do something she didn’t really want to do anyway.

So Darcy had gone ahead and graduated, only to find out that the job market for freshly-minted political science graduates wasn’t so great. In the end, desperate for any work she could get, Darcy had gotten a job as a barista at a coffee shop. It didn’t pay all that much, but it was enough to cover rent and groceries, and in the meantime Darcy kept sending out resumes and applying for interviews. While she didn’t want to be a barista for, like, forever, in the meantime Darcy found that she enjoyed it. She got to meet a lot of people, and it kept her busy, and the environment of the coffee shop was bright and warm.

Sometimes Darcy felt a pang of regret when she thought of SHIELD’s offer, but mostly, she was content with winging it and doing things her way. Besides, SHIELD probably would have had her under heavy surveillance or something, and while they probably still kept an eye on her since New Mexico just in case, Darcy really didn’t want to be watched 24/7 by the faceless and kinda sinister organisation who had the power to just march in and take whatever they wanted. Best to stay off their radar as much as possible.

It was a bit of a slow day, by the coffee shop’s standards, which for Darcy meant that she could comfortably keep track of orders without being rushed off her feet. Darcy was manning the counter when the door to the coffee shop opened, and she glanced up from the drink she was pouring to see a gorgeous redhead walk into the coffee shop.

Darcy grinned at the sight of her girlfriend.

Natalie Petrova was a bone-fide bombshell, with tousled red curls, a full mouth, and big, speculative eyes fringed by long dark lashes. Today she was wearing a leather jacket and tight jeans that hugged her figure, showing off every tempting curve, much to Darcy’s appreciation. She and Darcy had been dating for four months now.

Technically, Natalie was Russian, but you wouldn’t know it from her accent – Natalie sounded as American as Darcy herself did. Darcy had first met Natalie when the woman had come in and ordered a Vienna coffee. Darcy had been dazzled, and after flirting outrageously, had written _Hi Natalie, my name is Darcy_ on Natalie’s to-go coffee cup, along with her phone number. Natalie stopped at the coffee shop three more times before Darcy finally talked her into going on a date.

Darcy still didn’t know exactly what it was that Natalie did for a living – only that Natalie was some kind of consultant, and travelled all over the world as part of her job. Darcy was fine with that. After all, being a consultant couldn’t be that interesting, right? If Natalie didn’t want to talk about it, then Darcy wouldn’t push her. Besides, it wasn’t like Darcy didn’t have things she didn’t talk about – like meeting alien princes in the New Mexico desert, for one. Darcy had only been dating Natalie for four months, so it wasn’t like they were at the ‘share deep dark secrets’ part of the relationship yet.

“Hey babe, what’s wrong?” Darcy asked, as Natalie approached the counter. Her girlfriend’s expression was impassive, but Darcy knew her well enough to note the little worried furrow between her eyebrows, and the slightly strained look around her mouth.

Natalie hesitated, another sign that something was wrong.

“We need to talk,” she said finally. “Not here.”

“Oh my God,” said Darcy. “Are you breaking up with me?”

“What?” Natalie looked confused. “No. I just – we need to talk, okay? Now,” she added urgently.

“Okay,” Darcy agreed, feeling bewildered, but a little reassured. “Just give me a second, and we can go out back into the alley, okay?”

Darcy waved to Georgia, who was also working behind the counter today. Georgia was delivering cake and coffee to a customer, but a moment later she returned to the counter.

“What’s up?” Georgia asked, dumping the used tray on the counter near the sink.

“Listen, I need to talk to Natalie out back for a second, so can you cover?” Darcy responded.

“By myself?” Georgia frowned.

“It’ll only be for a few minutes,” Natalie promised, breaking into the conversation. Georgia wavered, and gave in.

“Okay, but don’t be long,” she said. “I’m only agreeing because it’s pretty slow right now, but if things speed up I’m going to need you back here, Darce.”

“Thank you so much,” said Darcy, and lifted part of the counter so that Natalie could walk through to the staff-only side, and tugged her out to the back of the coffee shop. The two of them walked out into the dingy little alley that backed onto the coffee shop.

“So what’s going on?” Darcy asked, turning to face her girlfriend.

Natalie hesitated again, looking uncharacteristically nervous.

“There are people coming after me,” she finally said slowly, which took Darcy’s worry in a totally new direction.

“People? Like, bad people?” Darcy asked, and Natalie gave a nod.

“Bad people,” she confirmed. “I… I haven’t been honest with you, Darcy.”

“What do you mean?” Darcy asked warily.

Natalie took a deep breath, and met Darcy’s eyes squarely. A moment later she spoke, and Darcy’s world tilted on its axis.

“My name isn’t Natalie Petrova,” she said bluntly. “It’s Natalia Alianovna Romanova, and I’m not a consultant. I’m an internationally wanted assassin, and the people who are after me work for a crime syndicate. I took out the wrong person, and now there’s a price on my head. People are coming to collect.”

“Oh my God.” Darcy stared at Natalie. “Tell me you’re joking.”

Natalie looked solemn.

“Darcy–”

“Holy shit, you’re not joking,” Darcy realised numbly. “You’re – not Natalie Petrova? You’re some kind of _assassin_? Who the hell are you really?”

“Natalia Romanova,” said – _Natalia_ , Darcy thought dully. “Some people call me the Black Widow, because – it doesn’t matter why. You can call me Natasha. It’s, it’s sort of like a nickname, but for close friends and family. It’s a Russian thing,” Natalia added.

“You’re kidding me, right?” Darcy blurted. “You just told me that everything I thought I knew about you was a lie, even your _name_ , and now you want me to use some cutesy nickname for you? Like nothing’s changed? I cannot even with this.”

“Darcy–” Natalia, Natasha – Darcy didn’t even know anymore – looked pained, but Darcy wasn’t done yet.

“And you said that people are after you because you killed the wrong person? Holy crap, are they going to come after _me?_ ”

“Hopefully not, but–”

“They _are_ going to come after me, shit, shit, shit.” Darcy pressed a hand to her forehead. “Oh my God. All this time, and I thought I knew you. I thought we had something! I should never have taken the job here. I should have taken that stupid offer with SHIELD and just gone with it. At least someone would have _told_ me I was dating a Russian assassin!”

“Wait, SHIELD?” Natasha looked incredulous. “You were offered a job at _SHIELD?_ ”

“It was an assistant position, okay, like an admin thing, I can’t talk about it – shit, why am I even telling you this? I don’t owe you anything. You’ve spent the last four months _lying_ to me,” Darcy ranted. “How can I trust you won’t use this information against me?”

“Darcy, I won’t, I promise.” Natasha looked upset. “I never wanted this to happen.”

“Oh, you never wanted this to happen,” Darcy retorted. “You mean you never wanted me to find out the truth.”

“ _No_ , I mean – not like this.” Natasha gave a sigh. “Not with our lives in danger. I was going to tell you, I swear. But – I’ve never really been able to have a relationship before. It just never worked. But with you – I felt _normal_.”

“Normal,” Darcy repeated, and then laughed bitterly. “Right. The killer assassin wanted to feel normal. I’m your sense of _normality_. Jesus Christ. Is there any worse way to tell me that I’m average and boring?”

“You’re not boring,” Natasha insisted, with quiet intensity. “You’re wonderful and quirky and dependable, and everything I’ve never been able to have before.”

“Suddenly I know how Debbie in _Grosse Pointe Blank_ feels,” said Darcy angrily. “Look, I don’t – I don’t care what you were thinking, okay? You _lied to me_. About stuff that was pretty damn important. You’re not the person I thought you were – literally. I don’t even know what to do with that, except that’s not even the important issue here, because there may be _people coming after_ _me_ because I’ve been inadvertently dating an assassin!”

“I’m sorry,” said Natasha, still looking unhappy. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

“That’s what they always say,” Darcy scoffed. “Come on, what did you think would happen?”

“I was thinking that I’d retire and spend more time with you,” Natasha said simply. “Go straight. Live a normal life. I don’t know how to do that, but I thought that with you, maybe I could learn.”

The sincerity in Natasha’s words hurt. Darcy turned away from her.

“Look,” Natasha said from behind her. “This life? Working as an assassin? It wasn’t a choice. I was raised this way from the time I was a small child. Just another starving orphan no one would miss. When I became an adult I got away from the people who had turned me into a weapon, but there was nothing else I knew how to do. I didn’t know how to be anything else. Being with you was the first time that I thought that maybe, there was a chance I could become something else, something other than an assassin. That’s the truth, Darcy.”

Darcy turned back to face her.

“I don’t care,” Darcy said, trying to keep her voice even. “This isn’t about your journey for self-actualisation or whatever, this is about you lying to me and the fact that I’m now in danger because I couldn’t make an informed choice. What am I supposed to do now?”

Natasha hesitated. She looked like she was thinking.

“What?” Darcy snapped. “Because seriously, if you have an idea, I’d love to hear it.”

“We go to SHIELD,” said Natasha. “Tell them I want to come in from the cold, and that my condition is your safety.”

Darcy stared.

“What?”

“Love is for children,” said Natasha, “but you are important to me, and I don’t want to see you hurt. Do you still have someone at SHIELD you can contact?”

“Well, I think I still have Agent Coulson’s card, but–”

“Trust me, it’s the best option.” Natasha looked pensive. “The others are waiting here for someone to come after you, or going on the run with me, and you wouldn’t like either of those options.”

“You’re right,” said Darcy. “I don’t. But I don’t like the idea of going to SHIELD, either. What if they disappear us?”

“They won’t,” said Natasha, with certainty. “SHIELD have a reputation for dealing with people about as honestly as any intelligence and protection agency can. They might lock me up, and question you, but they won’t hurt either of us. It’s not their style.”

Darcy swallowed.

“And then what?” she asked, hating that she could hear the tears in her voice. “You think things are going to go back to the way they were? That’s not going to happen.”

“If they don’t, they don’t,” said Natasha, with a shrug, although Darcy could see the pain in her eyes. “But at least you’ll be safe.”

“Fine,” said Darcy. “I’ll ring Coulson. His card should be in my address book at home, under ‘Son of Coul.’”

“Stay in the coffee shop, and don’t go anywhere,” said Natasha. “I’ve got a key to your place, I’ll get the card for you. But basically, stay in populated areas where people can see you, understand? Don’t go anywhere alone until we sort things out with SHIELD for your protection.”

“Fine,” Darcy said again. “I’ll see you when you get back. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a job to do.”

She walked back into the coffee shop without looking back, her vision blurred by the tears she refused to let fall.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Georgia took one look at Darcy’s bravely-soldiering-on face and said, “Oh my God, she dumped you.”

Darcy shook her head, giving a weak smile.

“Nothing like that, actually.”

“Cheated on you?” Georgia guessed.

“No,” Darcy said. “It’s just… she had some upsetting news for me, that’s all. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Are you okay?” Georgia eyed her with concern.

“Not really,” Darcy replied honestly. “Can we just get back to work? I don’t even want to think about it.”

“Sure,” said Georgia. “Do you want to make the drinks while I serve the customers? You look a little like you’re about to fall apart.”

“Yeah.” Darcy sniffled a little. “That sounds like a good idea.”

The two women went back to work. Darcy tried not to think about everything that Natasha had told her, but she couldn’t help it. Her thoughts kept going back to the shattering information she’d been given and her emotions were a roiling mess.

She didn’t know whether to believe Natasha’s claims of sincerity or not. Sure, Natasha had _seemed_ to be telling the truth, but then, she’d seemed perfectly sincere when she’d told Darcy that her name was Natalie Petrova, too. How did Darcy know that their relationship hadn’t all just been a big convenient lie? Did Natasha really care about her at all?

Darcy felt so conflicted. She was seriously in love with this woman, and Natasha seemed to care about her, too, but – _seriously?_ After everything Natasha had told her, how could they possibly continue their relationship after that? Darcy would never be able to trust anything out of her girlfriend’s mouth ever again.

Darcy sniffled as she made up a cappuccino for one of the waiting customers. Honestly, she was so _angry_ at Natasha for everything – lying, being an assassin, putting Darcy’s life in danger – but at the same time, she didn’t want to let her go. She felt so confused.

Some time later, Natasha reappeared through the coffee shop door. She went straight to the counter where Darcy was handing an iced chocolate to a woman in a black dress. Natasha waited until the woman had left the counter, then stepped forward.

“I found it,” Natasha said without preamble. “Come on, let’s go out the back again so that you can call your guy.”

“He’s not ‘my guy,’” said Darcy, lifting up the removable section of the counter to let Natasha through. “He’s an annoying suit who confiscated my iPod on the grounds of national security. Georgia, we’re just going to go out the back for a few minutes, we’ll be right back.”

Darcy headed straight for the back door without waiting for Georgia’s reply. Natasha followed her. Out in the alley Natasha unzipped her jacket, and extracted a business card from the inside pocket. She passed it to Darcy.

Darcy pulled out her phone and typed in the number, raising her phone to her ear as soon as it started dialling. After a couple of rings, the call was picked up.

“ _Coulson,_ ” said a familiar no-nonsense voice.

“Hi, uh, Agent Coulson? This is Darcy Lewis,” Darcy began awkwardly. “We met in New Mexico.”

“ _I remember,_ ” was the un-encouraging reply.

“Yeah, I uh, my girlfriend and I, we’re kind of in some trouble, and we thought SHIELD could help.”

“ _What kind of trouble?_ ” Coulson asked, his voice sharpening. Darcy took a deep breath.

“Well, um, I just found out that my girlfriend isn’t who I thought she was. She’s an assassin, and there are people after us, and we were hoping SHIELD could offer us some kind of help. My girlfriend is willing to join SHIELD, if that’s what it takes.”

There was a short pause on the other end of the phone.

“ _Miss Lewis, who is your girlfriend?_ ” asked Coulson.

“Her name is Natash – I mean, Natalia Romanova,” Darcy replied, “but um, I think she said some people call her the Black Widow?”

There was an even longer pause this time.

“ _Is your girlfriend there right now?”_ Coulson asked finally.

“Yeah.”

“ _Put her on the phone_.”

Darcy pulled the phone away from her ear and passed it to Natasha.

“He wants to talk to you.”

Natasha took the phone, looking wary.

“This is Natalia Romanova,” she said into the phone. There was a long moment where Natasha just listened, her expression growing tenser by the minute, before she replied to whatever Coulson said.

“Darcy is in danger,” said Natasha. “The people who are after me might come after her. I will do anything to stop that from happening.” There was a short pause. “Yes.” Another pause. “Agent Coulson, at this point I have a lot to lose. I’m willing to do whatever I have to to keep it.”

Natasha went quiet again, then spoke.

“Darcy works at a coffee shop. You could meet us here.” Short pause. “That sounds fine. We’ll be here.” Another pause. “I understand.”

Natasha pressed the end-call button, and silently handed the phone back to Darcy. She looked tenser than ever.

“What did he say?” Darcy demanded.

“He’ll meet us here in half an hour,” Natasha said. “He’s willing to discuss the issue, although he sounded suspicious. But that’s understandable.”

Darcy narrowed her eyes.

“The name I gave him, Black Widow, I’m pretty sure he recognised it if the long pause was any indication. Exactly how well-known _are_ you?”

Natasha shrugged.

“You could say I have a reputation.”

“Oh, great,” said Darcy. “You’re not just an assassin, you’re a _famous_ assassin.”

“Infamous would be a better description, but yes,” Natasha agreed. She hesitated. “The people who trained me, they only turned out the very best. Anyone who didn’t make the cut… well, no one ever saw them again. And I was the best of all the assassins they trained.”

“So you have a reputation.” Darcy echoed Natasha’s earlier words. “With Coulson, is that a good thing, or a bad thing?”

“I’m not sure.” Natasha glanced down the alleyway, and put a hand on the small of Darcy’s back. “We should get back inside.”

Darcy stepped forward, away from Natasha’s hand.

“Fine.” She walked back inside the coffee shop.

Natasha followed her back inside, lifting up the removable part of the counter so that she could take a seat near the back of the shop, facing the front door and the windows.

Darcy got back to work.

* * *

Half an hour later exactly, the coffee shop door opened, and in walked a slightly-balding, middle-aged man in a tailored grey suit. He walked sedately up to the end of the counter where Darcy was making coffee.

“Miss Lewis,” Coulson said. “Where is she?”

“Agent Coulson, I presume,” said Natasha from behind him. Her voice was cool, her expression an impassive mask. Coulson turned, and regarded Natasha with sharp eyes. He seemed a little surprised by what he saw.

“Black Widow,” he said thoughtfully. “I admit, I never thought I’d ever meet you in person.”

“We should take a seat,” Natasha said brusquely, and turned to walk back to her table facing the door.

Darcy quickly left the counter, ignoring Georgia’s meaningful glare, and dragged an extra chair over to join them.

Coulson looked at her with raised eyebrows.

“Miss Lewis–” he began.

“This involves me and my safety, okay, so if you’re about to tell me not to listen in you can go shove it,” Darcy declared, folding her arms. “I’m having a really bad day, okay, I found out my girlfriend is a wanted assassin and that people might try to abduct me or something, and I am so _done_ with everyone’s bullshit right now. So do not try and bullshit me, Coulson.”

She gave him her best steely glare, even though on the inside she felt like a puddle of marshmallow.

Coulson gave her a long look, but nodded.

“I suppose you have a point,” he allowed reluctantly. He transferred his gaze to Natasha, sitting silently opposite him. “Ms Romanova. What exactly is your purpose in contacting SHIELD?”

“I want protection for Darcy,” Natasha said immediately. “She’d be good leverage to use against me, and if anyone’s been watching me recently, they’re going to know that the two of us have been dating. She’ll make an easy target, and I don’t want that to happen.”

“I have a tazer, you know,” said Darcy half-heartedly. Natasha gave her a swift, fond glance, but otherwise Darcy’s comment went unacknowledged.

“Speaking bluntly, this situation isn’t SHIELD’s problem,” Coulson said, but raised a hand when Natasha sat forward in her seat, about to speak intensely. “However, your activities have been a thorn in SHIELD’s side for some time, and it would be to our advantage to have you working for us instead of freelance. SHIELD is willing to be quite generous in its terms, depending on exactly what the situation is. But first: who, exactly, is after you?”

Natasha gave a quiet sigh.

“Alberto Falcone has a price out on my head,” she admitted. “It’s high enough that a number of people in the business are interested in collecting it, besides the people he already has on it. I can deal with them, but if anyone gets hold of Darcy as leverage, my hands are tied. If Falcone is removed, that should take care of the problem.”

“You plan to take him out,” Coulson stated. “The biggest, nastiest crime lord in Italy.”

Natasha shrugged.

“It’s within my capabilities,” she said matter-of-factly.

“I see.” Coulson looked at her thoughtfully. “So what you want is for us to look after Miss Lewis while you take out Falcone, and then you intend to join SHIELD?”

“SHIELD has a reputation of being one of the good guys,” said Natasha. “I’ve been considering settling down. SHIELD seems like a good way to do that.”

“But you’d still be killing people,” Darcy blurted, and both Coulson and Natasha turned to look at her. “I’m really not okay with that.”

“Not all of our agents are assassins, Miss Lewis,” Coulson said, in a gentler voice than he’d used so far. “And Ms Romanova had proven herself to have a diverse skillset including infiltration and espionage. I am sure that we can arrange missions for her that don’t involve assassination, if she feels uncomfortable with the idea.”

Natasha was looking at Darcy intently.

“If you want me to stop, I’ll stop,” said Natasha softly.

Darcy felt put on the spot, like it wasn’t her place to tell Natasha what to do, but at the same time…

“Yes, I want you to stop killing people,” Darcy said firmly. “I mean, _obviously_ I want you to stop killing people. But don’t make this about me.”

Natasha gave a helpless shrug.

“You have a better moral compass than I do,” she said. “It’s one of the things I like about you. You always know what’s right and what’s wrong. It’s… reassuring.”

Darcy put her face in her hands and breathed for a minute. When she looked up again, Natasha was watching her with a tiny worried frown, and Coulson was actually wearing a sympathetic expression. Darcy wondered how bad she must look, to get that kind of response from the imperturbable Man in Black.

“Look,” said Darcy tiredly, “I can’t be some kind of beacon of righteousness or your journey to being one of the good guys, or whatever it is you think I am, Natasha.” Saying ‘Natasha’ felt strange in Darcy’s mouth, after all that time calling her girlfriend ‘Natalie.’ “I’m just… me.”

“I know,” said Natasha immediately, not even hesitating, despite Coulson’s presence, “and believe me, that’s all I want. My faults aren’t yours to deal with. That’s all on me. I don’t want you to feel somehow responsible for ‘fixing’ me. I don’t need to be fixed. I just…” Natasha hesitated. “I want someone who cares about me.”

“Is that part of why you didn’t tell me what you do for a living? Because you thought I’d feel like it was my responsibility to do something about it?” Darcy asked.

“I can give you a moment alone,” Coulson suggested, looking slightly uncomfortable at being caught up in the intimate discussion.

“Partly.” Natasha responded to Darcy’s question, ignoring Coulson’s interjection. “Mostly it was the fact that I enjoyed feeling like a normal person around you, and I didn’t want to ruin that.”

“I am so confused right now,” said Darcy. “You know that, right? And angry. Also angry. Really angry, in fact. But I also don’t want to lose you.”

An expression of tentative hope appeared on Natasha’s face. Coulson looked like he wished he were anywhere else.

“I’m willing to do whatever I need to to work this out,” said Natasha.

“Just, give me time,” Darcy said. “I don’t know what to think, right now.”

“If we can get back to our discussion?” Coulson asked.

Natasha looked at him. Darcy followed suit.

Coulson cleared his throat.

“As I was saying – it would be to SHIELD’s advantage to have you on our side, Ms Romanova. As to the terms and conditions…”

Darcy tuned out a little as Coulson and Natasha haggled over the conditions of her employment with SHIELD. Coulson admitted that if Natasha could assassinate Falcone, SHIELD wouldn’t exactly mind: apparently the guy was an unpleasant piece of work, and his illegal activities included both drug dealing and human trafficking, which SHIELD naturally didn’t feel positive about. Finally the two of them worked out an agreement both of them could accept.

“I’ll talk to the Director, but he should agree to everything we’ve discussed,” said Coulson, rising from his seat. Natasha and Darcy stood as well. “Here’s my card if you need to contact me for any reason. Do you have a contact number SHIELD can reach you on?”

Natasha reluctantly gave him her personal phone number. Coulson nodded, committing the number to memory.

“I’ll be in touch,” he said, turning to go.

“When?” Natasha coolly demanded.

“I’ll ring as soon as I have the Director’s approval. That should be by sometime this evening, at the absolute latest,” Coulson responded. “Ms Romanova. Miss Lewis.”

He turned and left the coffee shop.

“That went well,” said Darcy. “I think?”

“Nothing’s settled yet,” Natasha said, looking grim. “Until SHIELD’s Director approves, you and I are both still unprotected.”

“Uh.” Darcy had caught sight of the murderous look an overworked Georgia was sending her. “I should get back to work before Georgia kills me.”

“I’d avenge you,” Natasha said solemnly.

“Please tell me you’re kidding,” said Darcy.

Natasha grinned slightly.

“Ugh, please, it’s too soon for assassin humour,” Darcy said darkly, and returned to the front counter without another word.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Darcy knocked off late that afternoon, and Natasha was there waiting for her the moment her shift finished. The two of them walked back to Darcy’s apartment in silence, Darcy sneaking uncertain glances at the stoic-looking redhead next to her.

Darcy still didn’t know how to feel. Her emotions weren’t as turbulent as they had been earlier, but she still felt conflicted.

When they arrived at Darcy’s apartment Darcy went through her bag for her keys while Natasha waited, and finally pulled them out, and unlocked her front door.

Natasha didn’t leave.

“You can come in, I guess,” Darcy said, when it became clear that Natasha wasn’t going anywhere.

“Thanks,” said Natasha, walking inside before Darcy could. Darcy sighed, entering the apartment and pulling the door shut behind her. As she watched, Natasha entered every room in the apartment, systematically checking behind every cupboard door and every curtain. She even checked the shower cubicle.

“You’re totally scoping out my apartment for threats, aren’t you?” Darcy asked, trailing behind her, as Natasha finished checking the doors and curtains and started peering out the windows instead.

“This place isn’t exactly secure,” Natasha responded.

“Well, I’m going to go into my room and freak out for a while, so you just stay out here and finish whatever it is you’re doing.” Leaving Natasha to it, Darcy went into her bedroom and shut the door.

After letting her forehead thud gently against the door for a second, Darcy sat on her bed and pulled out her phone. Finding a number she hadn’t called in months, Darcy dialled, and waited.

The phone range several times before the call was picked up.

“ _This is Jane Foster_ ,” said Jane, her voice welcomely familiar.

“Jane? It’s Darcy,” Darcy said immediately.

“ _Darcy?_ ” Jane sounded confused.

“Oh my God, Jane, my life is crazy!” Darcy exclaimed into the phone. “I know we haven’t talked in like, ever, not since I finished the internship, but my life has gone crazy and you’re the only person I thought might have security clearance for this sort of thing.”

There was a bemused pause.

_“I’m listening_ ,” said Jane.

“Well, I’ve been dating this really hot woman–” Darcy began, but Jane interrupted.

“ _Wait, a woman? I didn’t know you were into that. I mean, you thought Thor was hot_.”

“Pretty sure everyone thinks Thor is hot,” said Darcy. “Probably even some really confused straight guys. But anyway, I’m bi.”

“ _Oh_ ,” said Jane.

“Yeah. Anyway, so I met this really hot woman, right? Gorgeous and funny and caring, and pretty much everything I could possibly want in a girlfriend. The closest thing to perfect you can imagine.”

“ _The closest thing I can imagine to perfect is Thor_ ,” said Jane, and yeah, she had a point.

“Besides Thor,” said Darcy.

“ _Okay_.”

“Well, I found out this morning that she’s actually an infamous assassin with a price on her head, and now my life is in danger.”

There was a stunned silence.

“ _Um, wow_ ,” said Jane. “ _That’s_ …”

“I _know_ ,” said Darcy wholeheartedly. “FML, seriously.”

“ _What are you going to do?”_ Jane asked.

“We contacted SHIELD earlier, and Natasha – my girlfriend – is going to defect or whatever it’s called to SHIELD,” Darcy told her.

“ _She’s still your girlfriend?_ ” Jane asked doubtfully.

“I don’t _know_ ,” Darcy wailed, throwing herself back on the bed. “Everything is terrible. I need advice.”

“ _I’m not sure I’m really the right person_ ,” Jane said.

“ _Jane_.”

“ _Alright, fine. How much do you care about this woman?_ ” Jane asked.

“A whole lot,” said Darcy honestly. “I’ve never met anyone like her before. She’s amazing.”

“ _She’s also an assassin_ ,” said Jane, acting the voice of reason.

“She’s going to become a SHIELD agent instead, though,” Darcy argued. “So I guess I can come to terms with that if she’s not actively killing people?”

“ _What’s actually bugging you the most about this?_ ” asked Jane.

“Besides the assassin thing? She lied to me. I didn’t even know her real name until today,” Darcy complained. “A relationship requires trust. How am I supposed to trust her after everything she told me turned out to be a lie?”

“ _Everything?_ ”

“Well, not everything,” Darcy admitted. “But some pretty big stuff, Jane. And I had _no idea_ she was lying. She could lie to me about anything, and how would I tell?”

“ _Has she lied to you about anything else?_ ” Jane asked.

“I don’t know!”

“ _Well, it sounds to me like you want to keep dating her, but you’re not sure it could work. I’m not sure what else to say_.”

“Come on, there has to be some kind of advice you can give me,” Darcy pleaded.

There was a long pause on the other end of the line, and Jane said finally:

“ _I guess the question you need to ask yourself is: is this woman worth taking the risk? Can you live with the fact that she lied to you? Is it worth taking the chance that she might lie again if it means that you can be together?_ ”

Darcy was quiet for a long time.

“ _Darcy?_ ”

“Yeah,” Darcy said slowly. “I think it is.”

“ _Well, there you go_ ,” said Jane. “ _I mean, I think you’re crazy, but you know, I’m also hoping to get back to the alien prince I knew for three days, so_ …”

“You’re as crazy as I am, just in a different way,” Darcy finished for her. “Love is a many-splendoured thing, etcetera.”

“ _Did this talk help?”_ Jane sounded like she genuinely cared about the answer.

“It did,” said Darcy. “Thanks.”

“ _Well, I’ve got some readouts waiting for me that I want to get back to, but good luck with everything_ ,” said Jane. “ _Really_.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll let you get back to your science,” said Darcy.

“ _Ring me some time, and let me know how everything turns out_ ,” said Jane.

“I will,” Darcy promised.

“ _Okay, I’m going now_.” Jane hung up.

Darcy sighed, and just lay there for a minute. Then she sat up, shoving her phone into her coat pocket, and walked over to open the bedroom door.

Peering into the kitchen-slash-living room, she saw Natasha sitting at the table with a bowl of cereal. Natasha looked up as Darcy walked out.

“Are you okay?” Natasha asked directly.

“I’ll live,” Darcy replied, taking her own seat at the table. The two women stared at each other.

Natasha looked just as awkward as Darcy felt. There was silence.

“How did you come to SHIELD’s attention?” Natasha asked eventually. “They don’t offer jobs to just anyone.”

“I can’t really talk about it, because it’s classified and stuff, but I was interning with Dr Jane Foster in New Mexico when her research turned out to be a lot more applicable than anyone expected. It was pretty hectic, but I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. SHIELD funded Jane’s research afterwards, and they offered me a position as her assistant.”

“But you turned it down,” Natasha stated, watching Darcy closely.

“Science isn’t really my thing,” Darcy pointed out. “I wanted to do other things with my life, you know? Maybe I’m not exactly where I wanted to be, but I’m here because of my own choices.”

Natasha looked down at her cereal, her expression contemplative.

“Were you really raised as an assassin?” Darcy asked.

Natasha nodded.

“They told me I was an orphan. Maybe it was even true,” she said with a shrug. “They weren’t kind, but they were thorough. I became a very good assassin.”

“I’m sorry,” said Darcy sympathetically.

“Don’t be.” Natasha looked serious. “I’m not. Whoever I am, my experiences shaped me. The choices I’ve made since then…” She shrugged again. “Who knows. I like to think that getting away from them was the best thing I ever did, but I don’t know whether I’ve made any good decisions. All I know is that I made the decisions that kept me alive.”

Darcy thought she understood, a little.

“I guess a good moral compass wasn’t an advantage in an assassin, huh,” she said.

Natasha didn’t smile.

“It isn’t.” She glanced down at her cereal, then back up at Darcy. “I’m good at logistics, not the moral dimension of things.”

Another silence fell, in which Natasha calmly ate her cereal, and Darcy thought about everything that had happened during the day.

“Promise me something,” Darcy said abruptly.

Natasha looked at her, still and silent.

“Don’t lie to me, okay? If you can’t tell me something, then say so. But don’t lie to me,” said Darcy. “Promise me.”

“I promise,” Natasha murmured, after a moment. “You’re being surprisingly forgiving.”

Darcy fiddled with the end of her sleeves.

“Well, I figure we had something pretty special,” she said slowly. “And maybe things won’t be the way before, but… maybe they’ll be better? Now we’re both being honest with each other?”

Natasha’s gaze was warm.

“I hope so,” she said quietly.

“I’m going to cook some dinner,” Darcy said after a moment. “You want to help?”

“If you need anything chopped, I’m great with knives,” said Natasha, smiling a little.

Darcy pointed a stern finger at her.

“I said, no assassin humour!”

Natasha’s mouth quirked, but she said no more.

* * *

Coulson’s phone call came when Natasha was halfway through chopping carrots for the stew Darcy was making. Putting the knife down, Natasha pulled her phone out of her pocket and took the call. Instead of saying something into the speaker, Natasha waited silently for the caller to identify themselves.

After a second Natasha said “Agent Coulson,” and relaxed slightly, listening intently to whatever was being said on the other end of the phone. After a minute or so she relaxed a little more.

“That sounds fine,” Natasha said finally, and a moment later hung up the phone.

“Are we good?” Darcy asked.

“We’re good,” Natasha confirmed, stowing her phone back away in her jacket. “There’ll be someone here to take you to a SHIELD safe house tomorrow morning. You’ll need to pack a bag tonight.”

“Wait, wait, what?” Darcy protested. “What do you mean, ‘take me to a safe house?’”

Natasha looked at her.

“It’s not safe here,” Natasha said patiently. “They’ll take you somewhere secure for as long as there’s a price on my head. I know it’s not what you want, but it’s necessary. You’ll need to pack for at least a week.”

“Seriously?” Darcy groaned. “Great.”

Natasha put a tentative hand on Darcy’s shoulder. Darcy felt too miserable to bother pulling away. When her touch met with no resistance, Natasha pulled Darcy into a gentle hug.

“It’ll be fine,” Natasha said reassuringly. “Just pack everything you need for a week or so, plus anything of high sentimental value.”

“Natasha, I live in a shoebox apartment, everything that’s not clothing or food or toiletries has high sentimental value,” Darcy pointed out. “I don’t have enough room to let things get cluttered. I have just enough room for all the important stuff, and that’s it.”

“So pack that stuff,” said Natasha. “You can deal with this, Darcy.”

Darcy sighed, and rested her chin on Natasha’s shoulder. She probably should have been pushing Natasha away, considering the situation, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to. Natasha might have lied to her, and Darcy was going to be mad and hurt about that for a while, but she was still the same woman Darcy had been dating for four months. Standing here like this felt familiar and comfortable.

“Just because I can deal with it doesn’t mean I want to,” Darcy said. Natasha didn’t reply, but hugged her a little tighter.

“We’d better get back to cooking,” Darcy said eventually.

“Of course,” Natasha agreed, letting Darcy go so that she could step back. “I’ll finish chopping the carrots.”

They worked more or less in silence. Things weren’t all that different during dinner: Darcy wasn’t sure what to say, and maybe Natasha was in the same boat, because she didn’t say anything either.

“Um,” said Darcy, idly stirring her stew with a spoon. “So, uh, I’m not really comfortable with sharing a bed with you tonight. After everything.”

“Okay.” Natasha accepted her words calmly. “I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Okay,” Darcy echoed, and they fell back into uncomfortable silence.

“Well, I’d better go pack,” said Darcy, finishing her stew and pushing her bowl slightly away. “Do you mind doing the dishes?”

“Not at all,” said Natasha.

“Okay then,” said Darcy, and went to pack the things she’d need over the next week.

Fortunately, Darcy had spent years moving in and out of dorm rooms and tiny apartments, so it wasn’t hard to fit the bare necessities into her battered roll-along luggage. It did take time, though, working out how to fit everything into the suitcase efficiently. Fortunately Darcy had learned to roll her clothes when packing so that they took up less room, and by the time she was done, Darcy had everything except the contents of a small toiletries case packed and ready to go.

Darcy stuck her head out into the kitchen-slash-living area to see Natasha stretched out on the couch, reading one of Darcy’s Harry Potter novels. Her feet were bare, and her leather jacket was hung over the back of one of the dining chairs. A spare blanket from the tiny linen cupboard was folded over the arm of the couch, ready for Natasha to use.

“I’m going to have a shower, and then I’m going to bed,” Darcy told her.

“I’ll shower in the morning,” said Natasha, glancing up from the Harry Potter novel.

“I’ll see you in the morning, then, I guess,” said Darcy.

That night her bed felt cold and empty without Natasha in it, and Darcy stayed awake for a long time, wondering what was going to happen next. She hoped that Natasha was right, and that everything worked out the way it was supposed to.

Knowing her luck, though, Darcy had a feeling that things were going to go differently.

As it turned out, she was right.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will probably be the last one.

**Chapter Four**

The next morning Natasha was in the shower, Darcy at the kitchen table eating breakfast, when there was a knock on Darcy’s apartment door. Darcy stopped eating, and stood up and walked closer to the door.

“Who is it?” she called out.

“I am with SHIELD,” said an accented voice.

Darcy hadn’t expected the SHIELD guy to get here so early.

“Who sent you?” she asked, just to make sure.

“The SHIELD agent you were talking to yesterday,” said the voice on the other side of the door. “I believe you made arrangements?” The voice sounded faintly sarcastic.

“Okay, just give me a second,” Darcy said, sliding the deadbolt and opening the door.

She blinked. Standing on the other side was a man wearing faded jeans and a rumpled hoodie, his hair in a buzz cut. He didn’t look like any SHIELD agent Darcy had ever met.

Before Darcy could do more than open her mouth to speak, the guy lunged, shoving a damp handkerchief over her mouth. Panicking, Darcy held her breath and tried to back away, but the guy got her in a headlock and pressed the handkerchief firmly against her mouth and nose. Darcy elbowed the guy hard, and heard a quiet grunt, but the arm around her neck and the wad of cloth over her face didn’t move.

Darcy sucked in a breath, unable to help it. A sickly-sweet taste filled her mouth, and Darcy felt dizzy. She renewed her efforts to get away, but they didn’t work.

The world was slowly darkening, and Darcy’s frantic movements were growing more and more uncoordinated.

Finally she succumbed to the drug, and slipped away into unconsciousness without even being able to let out a cry for help.

* * *

Darcy regained consciousness to the awareness of a killer headache. Her entire head throbbed with it, so strongly that she felt like she was about to be sick. Her head was lolling on her shoulder, and she was sitting upright, her hands tied behind the back of the chair she was sitting in. Darcy tried to move her feet, and found that they were tied in place.

Darcy opened her eyes, and immediately squeezed them shut again as the light hurt her eyes and made her nausea spike. Fighting against the urge to throw up, Darcy sat there, trying to keep her breathing slow and even, keeping her eyes shut.

Darcy had no idea how long she sat like that. She should have been trying to work out where she was and trying to think of a way to escape or something, but her head was throbbing and she felt too sick and disoriented to even open her eyes. So Darcy sat there for what felt like eternity, until eventually the headache and the nausea began to recede.

Finally, Darcy raised her head, opening her eyes and squinting a little. Everything still looked a little too bright, but at least she could see without wanting to puke. Her arms and legs felt numb from being trapped in the same position for too long.

Looking around, Darcy saw that she appeared to be in an empty warehouse.

“What the hell,” she said aloud, and winced at the croak in her voice. Darcy’s mouth and throat were very dry, and she swallowed a few times, trying to relieve the dryness. She wondered how long she’d been out of it.

“You are awake,” said the accented voice that Darcy had heard that morning, and Darcy craned her head to look as the man who had abducted her walked around in front of her.

“Who are you?” Darcy croaked, and swallowed again. Now that her headache and nausea was going away and Darcy could think again, she was feeling angry and afraid. She glared at the guy in front of her, refusing to let her fear show.

The guy only smiled at her.

“I am Batroc,” he said. He did an impressive leaping kick, which Darcy usually would have appreciated, but not when she was being held hostage.

She scowled. Batroc looked a little disappointed.

“I have seen you with the Black Widow many times,” he said. “You two are friends, yes? So we shall wait here, and in a little while we will hopefully be joined by your friend.”

“The word you’re looking for is ‘girlfriend,’” Darcy snarked, unable to help herself.

Batroc blinked.

“Wait, you are lesbians?” he said. “That is hot.” His eyes turned dreamy, as though he were picturing Darcy and Natasha together, which _ew_.

A moment later, Batroc sighed, and came out of his little reverie.

“So the Black Widow has a girlfriend,” he said, and grinned. “Who knew It is a pity that I must kill her, for she is very beautiful, and there is no one in the business better than she is, but with the price on her head…”

He shrugged in a ‘what can you do?’ kind of way.

“It is sad, but that is life,” he added.

“Is that like your life philosophy?” Darcy asked, acutely aware of the danger she was in, and unable to believe that she was even having this conversation. But if she didn’t talk, she was going to go into hysterics, and that would be bad.

Batroc considered the question.

“It is not a bad philosophy, but no. I would say that my philosophy is, ‘for money, anything is possible.’”

“Is there a lot of money on killing N- on the Black Widow?” Darcy asked, correcting herself halfway through.

“Very much,” Batroc nodded. “She really should not have killed Tonino Falcone the way she did. But he was not a nice man, so perhaps it is just as well.” He looked straight at Darcy. “Do not worry. It is only the Black Widow who has a price on her head. You, you are just the bait.”

 _That makes me feel so much better,_ Darcy wanted to say, but instead she kept quiet, not wanting to provoke the guy’s temper. She felt cold and panicky, and her arms ached in a distant kind of way.

Somewhere nearby there was the sound of a door opening, and Batroc immediately pulled out a gun and held it to Darcy’s head. Darcy swallowed again, squeezing her eyes shut as she felt tears of sheer fear welling up.

“Come here,” Batroc called, “unless you want your pretty little girlfriend to die.”

There was the sound of booted footsteps, drawing closer.

“What do you want?” Natasha asked coldly. Darcy bit back a sob at the sound of her voice, but didn’t dare open her eyes for fear of bursting into tears. She kept her eyes shut, listening as hard as she could.

“I want you dead,” said Batroc, and Darcy felt the gun muzzle leave her temple. “Nothing personal, you understand. The price on your head is too high to resist.”

There was the clunk of metal on the concrete floor.

“But I have heard all about the skills of the Black Widow,” Batroc went on, “and it seems a shame to simply kill you without seeing those skills for myself. So. Let us fight!”

Darcy’s eyes flew open in time to see Batroc execute one of the leaping kicks he’d performed earlier. Natasha ran backwards at incredible speed, so that Batroc landed on the concrete floor instead of her. He landed in a crouch, and before he could straighten up Natasha turned and kicked out at his head. Batroc grabbed Natasha by the ankle before the kick made contact. Batroc stood, still holding her ankle, so that Natasha was in the awkward position of having one foot on the floor and the other stretched up above her shoulder.

For anyone else getting out of this position would have been impossible, but not for Natasha. She leaped straight up in the air and kicked out with her free foot, the kick connecting with Batroc’s face. As Natasha came down again she twisted in midair, wrenching her foot from Batroc’s startled grasp.

Natasha landed in a crouch and scuttled backwards like a crab, out of Batroc’s range before he could recover from his surprise. Then she flipped herself upright, landing back on her feet before Batroc could move towards her.

Batroc paused for just a moment. His face split into a toothy grin. Then he ran forward.

Natasha blocked the punches and blows he rained down, dodging and ducking some of them. She moved almost faster than Darcy could see, swift and graceful, but Batroc was almost as fast. Darcy watched, spellbound, her terror temporarily suspended for the sake of awe, as the two of them fought. They were like tigers, ferocious in their movements but filled with incredible grace as each tried to disable the other.

There was a grunt of pain from Natasha as one of Batroc’s powerful blows landed on her face, the strength of it sending her sprawling backwards. Batroc pulled back one leg to kick her, but Natasha was rolling, rolling out of range and straight back onto her feet. She spat out some blood, much to Darcy’s concern, and was immediately back in the fight, running forward and leaping to kick Batroc in the chest with both feet. This time it was him who fell backwards, as Natasha back-flipped off his chest, landing on the floor in time to jab him in the throat as he fell.

Batroc rolled to his feet, coughing, but didn’t make the mistake of grabbing for his throat: instead, he kept his hands free, ready to deal with Natasha as he scrambled backwards.

Natasha took another running leap, but this time – Darcy had to replay it in her head to work out what had happened – she got Batroc’s head between her thighs and sort of flipped, so that Batroc was sent flying to the floor a second time. As Natasha landed on her feet Batroc grabbed her ankle and pulled, so that Natasha fell to the floor as well, caught off-balance. Before Natasha could get back up Batroc was on her, getting his hands around her throat and choking her.

Darcy watched with horrified eyes and bated breath as Natasha struggled for breath, trying to get free. There was a choked-off yelp of pain from Batroc and he crumpled forward, Natasha wriggling free from under him and crawling away, coughing heavily. Darcy realised that her girlfriend had kneed the bastard in the crotch.

Even that didn’t stop Batroc for long, though. He got to his feet, expression murderous, while Natasha was still on her hands and knees coughing.

He took a step forward towards her, menace in every line of his posture, and Darcy mentally begged Natasha to get up, too frozen with fear to say a word.

The next moment Batroc toppled to the floor, something protruding from his neck. It took Darcy a moment to realise that it was an arrow.

Natasha looked up at something behind Darcy, taking deep, wheezing breaths as she got to her feet. Her expression was wary and dangerous.

“Easy,” said an unfamiliar voice, somewhere behind and above Darcy. “I’m with Coulson. He should be here any minute now.”

“And you are?” Natasha’s voice was hoarse from being almost strangled.

“Hawkeye,” said the man behind Darcy simply, and a look of fleeting recognition crossed Natasha’s face.

“You were the one I fought in Budapest,” she said, and turned her head as there was the sound of the warehouse door opening.

“It’s all-clear, boss,” said Hawkeye behind Darcy, as Agent Coulson walked into view. Coulson nodded at him, and looked at Darcy and Natasha.

“Ms Romanova,” he said pleasantly, as though there wasn’t a dead guy on the floor and Natasha wasn’t wheezing out a lung while Darcy was tied to a chair.

Natasha look one long, deep breath, her breath still wheezy, and her stance slowly relaxed. Then she turned, and her eyes met Darcy’s, and Natasha’s expression was suddenly full of the frantic worry she hadn’t allowed herself to show while dealing with Batroc. Darcy realised that it was over.

Darcy closed her eyes, tears trickling from beneath her closed eyelids in relief. A moment later there were hands cupping her face.

“Darcy, you’re okay,” Natasha murmured, “open your eyes, it’s alright. We’ll get you untied in a minute.”

Darcy opened her eyes, unable to help the sobs that escaped her. Natasha only smoothed her hair back from her face and murmured reassurances.

“Just stay really still, okay,” said Hawkeye, closer this time. “I’m going to cut you free. You hear me?”

“I h-hear you,” Darcy said, through her sobs. A moment later her arms were dangling instead of tied behind the chair. Darcy tried to move them, but couldn’t. Natasha started to rub her arms for her, massaging the muscles to get the blood flowing again.

A youngish blonde guy in SHIELD gear moved into Darcy’s field of vision – Hawkeye – and got down on one knee near Darcy’s feet. He worked on cutting her legs free of the ropes that bound them to the chair legs, as Natasha kept briskly rubbing Darcy’s arms. After a minute or two Darcy started experiencing pins and needles in her arms, the tingling growing almost painful as the feeling started coming back to her arms. She tried to move her legs, and they started to develop pins and needles too, the numbness disappearing.

“Darcy, are you alright? Did he hurt you?” Natasha asked, her voice still a gentle murmur. Coulson and Hawkeye were hovering behind her, but Darcy only had eyes for Natasha as she shook her head.

“He didn’t hurt me,” Darcy managed. “I’m fine, just, pins and needles.” More tears flowed down her face, and Darcy blinked repeatedly, trying to stop the tears.

Natasha wrapped her arms around Darcy in a hug, and Darcy leaned into it, pressing her face into Natasha’s neck. She was probably getting Natasha’s neck all wet, but right now Darcy didn’t care.

“God I love you,” Darcy blurted. “I’ve never been so glad to see someone in my life, but I was so worried he was going to hurt you. I saw you spit out blood before. Are you okay?”

“My teeth cut the inside of my mouth, that was all,” Natasha assured Darcy, pulling back to meet Darcy’s eyes. “It’ll be fine.”

“Oh, good,” said Darcy.

“There’s a first-aid kit in the van,” said Coulson, after delicately clearing his throat to get their attention. He was wearing the bland expression, but his eyes were full of angry concern. “Miss Lewis, as soon as you can walk, we’re taking you to a SHIELD safe house.”

“Right,” said Darcy, and gave a semi-hysterical laugh. “Because I never made it there this morning.”

“What happened?” Natasha asked, her eyes searching Darcy’s. “I got out of the shower, and you were gone and the door was open. I knew you must have been taken, but I didn’t hear a thing.”

Darcy shook her head, a sense of furious, raw shame filling her.

“He said he was a SHIELD agent,” she muttered, looking down at her knees so that she didn’t have to see the looks on Natasha or Coulson’s face. “I let him in.”

Natasha cupped Darcy’s face in her hand, tilting her head up so that their eyes met. Against Darcy’s expectations, Natasha’s expression was one of understanding and regret.

“It’s not your fault, Darcy. I should have told you not to open the door for anyone until I was out of the shower.”

“Ms Romanova is right,” said Coulson. “We should have had procedures in place to ensure that no one impersonated the agent we sent, but we didn’t. I apologise for the fact that you were caught up in this situation after we promised to protect you.”

“That’s okay,” said Darcy, even though it wasn’t. “Just – can someone help me stand?”

Hawkeye immediately moved forward, getting an arm under Darcy’s shoulder and supporting her as she got to her feet. Darcy’s attempts to walk were clumsy and uncoordinated, her legs still tingling with pins and needles, but with Hawkeye and Natasha’s help, she managed to walk outside.

“This is going to take forever,” Hawkeye said, his voice matter-of-fact. “You mind if I carry you?”

Darcy had to admit that her legs still weren’t working all that well.

“Go ahead.”

She squeaked as Hawkeye swung her into a bridal hold and started walking. Natasha quickened her pace to keep up with the two of them. Coulson fell into step beside them on Hawkeye’s other side.

The small group made it to the van, and Darcy was bundled inside. She found herself sitting on the van seat, Natasha’s arms wrapped around her, as the van’s engine started, and they headed for the safehouse.

Darcy leaned into Natasha’s embrace, and didn’t say a word until they reached their destination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Batroc is based on the movie version, not the comic version.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had no clue how to end this, so the story just sort of... peters out. Hopefully this is okay anyway.

**Chapter Five**

The safehouse turned out to be an apartment in a building with really good security. While Darcy was busy being kidnapped someone had apparently collected her bag, because when Darcy entered the nearest bedroom she found it sitting next to the bed, waiting for her. Darcy’s lip trembled a little at the sight, feeling touched and relieved by the forethought, but got a hold on herself before she could burst into tears.

She emerged into the main living area again, to find that Hawkeye was gone, but that Coulson was standing with Natasha, an attentive expression on his face. Darcy had already been checked over by a SHIELD medic the moment they’d reached their destination, and the medic had confirmed that Darcy was more or less fine, but Darcy was pretty sure Coulson still felt angry and guilty that she’d been kidnapped in the first place.

Darcy decided that Coulson wasn’t too bad, for an iPod-stealing, covert organisation stooge. At least his heart was in the right place.

“I hope you’ll be comfortable here,” said Coulson. “The fridge and pantry are fully-stocked, the bathrooms have been supplied with toiletries, and fresh linen and towels were put in place this morning. Again, I apologise for your abduction. SHIELD is usually more on-the-ball than that.”

“You weren’t sure whether I was telling the truth,” said Natasha, her eyes boring into Coulson’s, her expression difficult to read even for Darcy.

Coulson hesitated, but –

“Yes,” he admitted finally. “Our deal was only approved at the last minute, and it led to sloppy procedures. The Director had his concerns.”

“I trust that they’re now alleviated?” Natasha asked.

Coulson smiled briefly.

“He’s a little more convinced, although I’d say he still has some concerns. But give it time.”

Coulson glanced back at Darcy.

“Miss Lewis, Ms Romanova,” he said. “I’ll leave you to get settled in. If you have any problems or questions, you can talk to Amanda in reception downstairs. She’s the agent in charge of managing SHIELD concerns within the building.”

With a nod, Coulson left, shutting the apartment door behind him. It locked automatically.

Darcy looked at Natasha.

“You’re going to leave, aren’t you?” Her words came out sounding forlorn, even thought she’d been aiming for a neutral tone.

Natasha looked regretful.

“By tomorrow morning at the latest. If I don’t deal with Falcone soon, the odds of someone getting in a lucky shot against me will only get stronger.” She took a step forward, tenderly brushing Darcy’s hair away from her face. “But I’ll do my best to come back as soon as possible. Promise.”

“You’d better,” said Darcy, staring deeply into her eyes. The two of them were so close that they were almost touching. With a tiny step forward, Darcy closed the space between them.

Darcy had kissed ‘Natalie’ a thousand times. Kissing Natasha was just the same. Darcy rested her hands on Natasha’s hips, pulling her closer, and Natasha responded by wrapping her arms around Darcy’s neck and deepening the kiss.

After a few heated moments, Darcy broke the kiss, pulling back an inch or so.

“Stay with me tonight,” she breathed. “I don’t care if you have to leave in the morning – well, okay, I do, but – just, stay with me tonight.”

“Of course,” Natasha replied, kissing Darcy again.

By silent, mutual agreement, the two made their way to the bedroom. Natasha shut the door, and Darcy leaned back against it, giving Natasha her best sultry look. Natasha gave Darcy a slow, thorough once-over, and by the time her eyes met Darcy’s again her gaze was full of heat. Natasha’s expression sent a little thrill through Darcy, as Natasha stepped forward into Darcy’s space, pinning her against the wall. Natasha was a little shorter than Darcy, but there was no doubt who was taking control in this encounter.

The two of them made out like teenagers, necking against the door, until Darcy made use of a break in the kissing to gasp out, “Bed.”

Natasha took a step back, breathing just as heavily, her eyes filled with intermingled fire and affection.

“Bed,” she agreed lowly, and taking Darcy by the hand, tugged her over to the bed. The two of them tumbled onto it, Natasha on top as Darcy lay back, staring into Natasha’s eyes.

Then Natasha closed the tiny gap between them, and things rapidly progressed from there.

* * *

Natasha was gone for almost two weeks.

During that time Darcy got used to living in the safehouse. She wasn’t allowed to go to work – it was considered too dangerous for the time being – so Darcy got used to her new routine of lazing around, watching movies on the TV or surfing the internet on her laptop. The days passed slowly, each one similar and unremarkable.

Normally Darcy would have enjoyed the break and the chance to be lazy, but not this time. There was a part of her that couldn’t quite relax, knowing what Natasha was out there trying to do. In spite of herself, Darcy couldn’t help worrying about her girlfriend. Sure, Natasha was good at what she did, but all she needed was a bit of bad luck and she could find herself in serious trouble. The possibility gnawed at Darcy, especially late at night when she was trying to clear her thoughts so that she could go to sleep. Darcy figured that if she and Natasha were staying together, this sort of anxiety about Natasha’s job was something she was probably going to need to get used to.

Darcy thought a lot about her relationship with Natasha during this time. They were going to have to work to rebuild things – with trust and honesty being part of the package, this time – but that was okay. This time, they’d be doing things _right._ Darcy cared a lot about Natasha, and Natasha had already proven how much Darcy meant to her. Maybe some people would have left and found someone else to be with, after discovering Natasha’s lies, but Darcy felt that she was making the right choice in staying. What she and Natasha had? It was worth staying for.

Coulson checked in with Darcy every morning and night, either himself or through Hawkeye – or Agent Barton, as he was otherwise known. Darcy found that both agents were growing on her – Coulson wasn’t such a bad guy, and Hawkeye was a self-deprecating smartass who always seemed to know what to say to cheer Darcy up.

By the time that two and a half weeks had passed, Darcy just wanted Natasha to come home so that they could get their relationship back on track. (And have ‘welcome home’ celebratory sex, obviously.)

Darcy was half-way through watching _Grosse Pointe Blank_ (it had always been one of her favourite movies, but it had a whole extra heaping of relevance these days, after the whole finding-out-the-love-of-your-life-is-an-assassin thing; no, really, Darcy had _all_ the Debi Newberry feels) when she heard the front door creak open.

Coulson and Barton always knocked. _Always_.

Darcy immediately scrambled around to peer over the back of the couch, ready to scream for help and grab her tazer if necessary. But standing in the apartment doorway was Natasha, wearing a black suit, her red curls pinned back from her face, and her expression tentative. A small set of wheeled luggage stood next to her.

“Natasha!” Darcy yelped, almost flipping the couch in her hurry to get to her girlfriend.

At Darcy’s exclamation a smile appeared on Natasha’s lips, small but genuine. She let go of her luggage just in time to wrap her arms around Darcy as Darcy flung herself at her.

“You’re back!” Darcy said, and hugged Natasha tightly. “Ohmygod, I missed you so much.”

“That’s good to hear.” Something cool and cautious that had been in Natasha’s eyes vanished, to be replaced by warmth. “Believe me, I missed you too.”

“Get in here properly so I can kiss you,” Darcy declared, taking a step back. Natasha took a step forward into the apartment, pulling her luggage along with her, and shutting the door behind her.

Natasha let go of her luggage, and raised an expectant eyebrow. Darcy grinned, and stepped forward.

They kissed for a couple of minutes, relearning the familiar feel of each other after their time apart. Darcy started to deepen the kiss, with notions of taking things further, but Natasha broke the kiss and leaned back.

Darcy sent her a look of faintly hurt confusion.

“Natasha?”

“No offence, kissing you is lovely, but I’m absolutely starving,” said Natasha. “I might actually pass out if I don’t stop and eat something right now. Can we continue this later?”

Darcy snorted.

“Sure. There’s ham and like, half a rotisserie chicken in the fridge, if you want that. Plus there’s fresh bread, so we can make sandwiches if you want.”

“I want,” Natasha agreed. “A chicken sandwich sounds great.”

So Darcy got the bread out of the pantry cupboard while Natasha got the chicken out of the fridge. It only took a minute or so to cut off some slices of chicken and make a sandwich. Darcy made one for herself as well, because now she thought about it, she was actually kind of hungry.

Natasha and Darcy stood at the kitchenette bench eating their sandwiches, not even bothering to sit down at the table as they ate.

“What are you watching?” Natasha asked, her eyes going to the TV as on-screen Martin Blank took out a guy with a frypan.

“Oh my God, you’ve never seen this movie?” asked Darcy, through a mouthful of food. Holding a sandwich in one hand and picking up the DVD remote in the other, Darcy pressed ‘stop.’ “You have to see it. It’s the coolest assassin movie ever, with the possible exception of _R.E.D_. It’s about an assassin attending his high school reunion and getting back together with his high school sweetheart, who has no idea what he does for a living.”

Natasha’s eyebrow lifted.

“That sounds… interesting.”

“It’s the best.” Darcy finished her sandwich. “Come on, come sit and watch it with me. I can start it from the beginning.”

“You know, when I thought about your reaction when I came back, I figured you’d be more curious about whether my mission was successful,” Natasha mused, before taking another bite from her sandwich.

Darcy paused halfway through going through the DVD menu.

“Well, it was, right?”

“Falcone’s no longer a problem,” Natasha agreed. “Which means that no one else should be, either.”

“Fabulous,” said Darcy, selecting the ‘play movie’ option on the DVD menu. She seated herself on the couch, leaving an empty space beside her. Natasha finished her sandwich and joined Darcy, sliding into the empty spot on the couch next to Darcy.

Darcy leaned her head on Natasha’s shoulder, snuggling closer. Natasha rested her hand on Darcy’s leg, leaning her head against Darcy’s.

Darcy pressed ‘play,’ and the music of the film’s opening credits started to play.

“So this movie, does it have a happy ending?” Natasha asked.

Darcy smiled and took Natasha’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I could just make you wait until you see for yourself, but yes. It has a happy ending.”

“I’ll tell you a secret,” said Natasha. “I’m a sucker for happy endings.”

The two of them fell silent as the movie began to start, and Darcy’s heart swelled with happiness at the fact that Natasha was here, with her, snuggling on the couch.

Maybe their relationship hadn’t been exactly _conventional_ , so far, but the best love stories were always unconventional, Darcy thought.

“So I was thinking,” Darcy murmured aloud, “when it’s safe enough to move out of the safehouse, we should move in together.”

Natasha was silent for a long moment.

“I’d like that,” she said finally. “We should find a new place, one that suits both of us.”

“Yeah,” said Darcy, smiling. “That sounds great.”

Natasha squeezed her hand, and the two of them watched the movie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There may be bonus material coming.


	6. Bonus material: several months later

**_Bonus: (several months later…)_ **

The Avengers were sitting in various stages of weariness and shock, tiredly eating shawarma, when there was a vibration against Natasha’s leg.

It took her a moment to realise that it was her phone. Her _civilian_ phone.

Reaching down, Natasha removed it from the hidden pocket and answered the call.

Natasha had a policy of not identifying herself by speaking until the other person spoke first, but this time she wouldn’t had had a chance to speak first even if she’d wanted to, because Darcy had started talking the moment Natasha picked up.

“ _Oh my God, what is wrong with you, I just saw footage of you fighting aliens in New York! Are you okay? Please tell me you’re okay._ ”

Relief washed over Natasha at the sound of Darcy’s voice. Her girlfriend sounded unhurt.

“I’m fine,” said Natasha. Darcy didn’t give her the opportunity to say anything more.

“ _I was so worried, like seriously freaking out, although also weirdly turned on. You look really hot when you’re beating up aliens, did you know that? Wait, that’s not what I meant to say. What’s going on? Are the aliens gone? Is the invasion over?_ ”

“The invasion’s over,” Natasha agreed. The others were glancing at her in curiosity, except for Clint, who was smirking faintly, a ghost of his usual expression. “We kicked their asses.”

“ _Go you!_ ” said Darcy. “ _Kicking asses and taking names.”_ She hesitated for a moment. “ _How bad is it?”_

“It’s pretty bad,” responded Natasha. “A lot of people were hurt, and half of Manhattan was destroyed. It’ll probably take years to repair all the damage.”

“ _Well. That sucks.”_

“I assume you’re okay,” said Natasha, allowing concern to trickle into her voice.

“ _Yeah, it’s a good thing I was away visiting Jane. With our luck, or apartment’s been totalled.”_ Darcy paused. _“You’re really okay?”_ she added in a quieter voice.

“I swear, sweetheart, I’m fine,” said Natasha. She caught herself on a yawn. “Just tired. I could sleep for a week. Fighting aliens takes a lot out of you.”

“ _Uh-huh. Well, take care of yourself. Don’t let them overwork you. You’re a hero, make them give you some time off, or something._ ”

“Time off would be nice,” Natasha mused. “We could visit your mom.”

“ _Ahaha, no, not happening_ ,” Darcy said firmly. “ _I know you and mom get on like a house on fire, but that’s exactly my point. I’d like to get out of the house alive.”_

In spite of everything that had happened that day, Natasha found herself smiling fondly.

“We’ll see.”

“ _No, dammit, we will not see, we are not going to visit my mom. Case closed. Hey, were you really fighting with Captain America? Alongside him, I mean. Is he actually the guy who beat up Nazis in World War Two?”_

“He’s the real deal. I’ll get a selfie with him later if you like,” Natasha offered. She cast a look at Rogers, who looked like he was falling asleep at the table. “Then again, he might be asleep by then.”

“ _I could live with a picture of Captain America sleeping,_ ” Darcy said thoughtfully. _“Is he really as hot as he used to look on all the old news reels?”_

Natasha sent Rogers an appraising look.

“I’d have to say he’s hotter than he looks in the news reels. Better definition.”

“What?” Rogers blinked owlishly, while Stark and Clint both snorted, working out what Natasha was talking about.

“Tell Darcy he works out, if she’s thinking of upgrading,” Clint offered. Natasha gave him a shove that sent him sprawling to the floor.

“ _I definitely want a photo, then,_ ” said Darcy, unaware of what was going on on the other end of the phone. “ _Anyway, Jane’s freaking out, so I’d better go calm her down, but call me when you have time, okay? Oh, and tell Thor that if he leaves without_ at least _leaving a message for Jane, I’ll have his balls._ ”

“I will,” said Natasha, smiling a little. “I’ll talk to you soon, _zaichik.”_

_“Love you,”_ said Darcy.

When Natasha finished hanging up, she found herself the subject of several interested gazes.

“Darcy Lewis says that if you don’t leave a message for Jane Foster before you return to Asgard, she’ll castrate you,” Natasha told Thor.

A look of mingled embarrassment and delight swept over Thor’s face.

“Darcy Lewis!” he exclaimed heartily. “She is well, then?”

“Wait, _she?_ ” said Stark, unable to keep his nose out of someone else’s business when it was being dangled in front of him. “You have a _girlfriend?_ ”

Natasha smiled slightly.

“I do.”

“Yeah, theirs is a love story for the ages,” said Clint. “Kidnappings, switching sides, it’s got it all. Darcy’s why Nat joined SHIELD in the first place.”

“Spill,” Stark urged.

“Nah, you’ll have to ask Nat,” said Clint.

“Keep your nose out of my business, Stark,” said Natasha.

“I am hurt, _hurt_ –” Stark began, but Natasha didn’t pay any attention.

She was too busy snapping a picture of a napping Rogers on her phone and sending it to Darcy.  
 


	7. Bonus material: how Darcy & Natasha met

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is the original (incomplete and alternate) version of chapter one, which contains their first meeting, and part of their first date.
> 
> I abandoned this version because I realised it would take too long to get to the part of the fic that I actually wanted to write, but I figured you guys might enjoy reading it.

**How Darcy and Natasha met (the original version of chapter one)**

It was a bit of a slow day, by the coffee shop’s standards, which for Darcy meant that she could comfortably keep track of orders without being rushed off her feet. Darcy was manning the counter when the door to the coffee shop opened, and she glanced up from the drink she was pouring to see a gorgeous redhead walk into the coffee shop.

The woman was a bone-fide bombshell, with tousled red curls, a full mouth, and big, speculative eyes fringed by long dark lashes. She was wearing a leather jacket and tight jeans that hugged her figure, showing off every tempting curve – the woman had it, and boy was she flaunting it. Black combat boots finished off the ensemble. Her mouth hanging open slightly, Darcy stared as the woman came up to the counter, her higher brain functions temporarily off-line.

A second later Darcy realised that she was still pouring the drink and hastily re-directed her eyes to the almost-full cup. Kicking her brain back into gear, Darcy finished making the drink and called out the customer’s name, handing the cup to them as they walked up to the counter to collect it.

That done, Darcy turned back to the waiting redhead with her best sultry smile.

“Well, _hello_ ,” she said appreciatively. “What can I get you?”

The hot redhead raised one eyebrow, as though she wasn’t used to baristas at coffee shops hitting on her. Or maybe it was the fact that it was another woman hitting on her: that threw some people off. Besides the raised eyebrow, though, she showed no other sign of surprise.

“I’d like a Vienna coffee,” she requested.

“One Vienna coffee coming right up,” Darcy said. “And can I get your name? For the coffee,” she added quickly, “although honestly, I wouldn’t mind knowing for personal reasons too, because you are ridiculously gorgeous.”

“Natalie,” said the hot redhead, after a short pause. “Do you normally hit on your customers?”

Darcy gave a shrug.

“My life is boring, the day is long, and sometimes hot people enter the coffee shop. No one as hot as you, though.” Darcy gave a flirtatious smile.

“I’d just like a coffee,” said Natalie, although she looked faintly amused.

“And I am totally on that,” Darcy promised. “That’ll be 2.70. To go, or have here?”

“Have here,” Natalie replied, handing Darcy the money for her coffee.

“Gotcha. One Vienna coffee coming right up,” said Darcy. “Tell you what, take a seat, and I’ll bring it out to you when you’re done.”

“Thanks,” said Natalie, and left the counter to take a seat at a table by the window.

It took a few minutes to make the coffee, but Darcy finished it off with some whipped cream and cocoa powder. She put the cup on a saucer and put the whole lot on a tray, which she carried over to Natalie’s table.

“There we go, one Vienna coffee,” said Darcy, putting the coffee down on the table in front of Natalie. “So, are you a local, or just visiting the Big Apple, or…?”

Natalie gave Darcy a narrow-eyed look, pausing in the act of raising her coffee to her lips.

“I’m both, really,” Natalie admitted, after a moment’s scrutiny. “I visit frequently, but I don’t actually live here.”

“So you travel a lot?” Darcy surmised. “Cool.”

“You know, there’s a line in front of the counter. Shouldn’t you be getting back to your customers?” Natalie asked.

“Shit, you’re right,” said Darcy. “Well, enjoy your coffee.” She hurried back to the counter and began taking orders, and by the time she’d finished making them all, Natalie had finished her coffee and left the coffee shop.

“Balls,” Darcy sighed, leaning against the counter dolefully.

* * *

Two days later, though, Natalie was back. This time she was wearing a striped hoodie and aviators, but the bouncy red curls were unmistakeable.

“Hey there,” Darcy said, leaning on the counter to give Natalie a slightly better look at her cleavage. What? Darcy believed all was fair in love and war, and using your assets to your advantage was important. “Vienna coffee?”

Natalie gave her a bemused look.

“Actually, today I’d like a latte to go,” she corrected, handing Darcy the correct change without being asked.

“You like some variety in your choices, huh?” Darcy rang the order up, and Natasha stepped back from the counter to wait.

Darcy grabbed out one of the cardboard to-go cups and picked a permanent marker up off the countertop.

 _Hi Natalie, my name is Darcy,_ she wrote on the cup, and wrote her phone number underneath. No harm in that, right? That done, she set about making the latte.

“Hey Natalie, your coffee is ready,” Darcy called out, and Natalie stepped forward to grab her coffee.

“Thanks,” she said, and looked at her coffee cup curiously. A faint smile curved her mouth as she read what was written on it, and she looked back at Darcy.

“Darcy, huh?” Natalie asked. “Unusual name.”

“Yeah, it means 'dark one',” Darcy said, ignoring the people waiting at the other end of the counter. “My parents have weird taste in names.”

“Listen, Darcy, you seem nice,” said Natalie. “So let me give you a piece of advice. I am really, really not a nice person, and however much you think you want to go out with me, you really don’t.”

“Okay, thanks for the warning,” Darcy said slowly, “but it’s kind of condescending of you to assume you know what kind of person I’m interested in, don’t you think?”

Natalie gave Darcy a long, thoughtful look.

“Trust me, I’m trouble,” Natalie said, but Darcy only smiled at her.

“Maybe that’s how I like my women,” Darcy said, lowering her voice.

“Your women?” Natalie interrupted, raising her eyebrows.

“Sure,” said Darcy, her voice still low. “I like my women the way I like my coffee: hot, strong, and covered in whipped cream,” she finished suggestively, and grinned triumphantly when Natalie snorted and raised her coffee cup to cover a smile.

“You really don’t go for subtle, do you,” Natalie remarked, her lips twitching.

“I like to be up-front with people,” Darcy agreed. “Fewer misunderstandings that way.”

“Excuse me, I’ve been waiting for five minutes!” a customer at the other end of the counter said loudly. Both Darcy and Natalie ignored him.

“Fine,” said Natalie.

“Fine?” Darcy asked hopefully.

“One date,” Natalie said briskly. “Are you free Friday night?”

“Sure,” Darcy confirmed.

“There’s an Italian restaurant two streets away, _Paolo’s,_ ” said Natalie. “Meet me there at seven.”

“I totally will,” Darcy promised, and Natalie gave her a small smile.

“I have to go,” said Natalie, glancing at the door, and back at Darcy. “But I’ll see you Friday.”

“See you then,” Darcy agreed, and watched Natalie leave the coffee shop. As soon as Natalie was out of sight, Darcy whooped and pumped her fist.

“Yes!” she called out happily, and returned to the other end of the counter to serve the impatiently waiting customers.

**Their first date:**

Friday evening, Darcy dressed up in her hottest red mini dress and scarlet heels, and her favourite red lipstick. The dress was kind of slutty, but in a classy sort of way, clinging to Darcy’s body while keeping all of the important bits covered. Darcy had worn her hair in plaits all day at work, and when she unplaited and shook her hair out that evening, it fell in glorious loose waves across her shoulders and back.

Darcy surveyed her reflection in the mirror, and decided that she looked pretty goddamn hot.

She had nothing on Natalie, though, it turned out. Natalie was wearing a tight black sheath dress that came to the knee, black stockings, and shiny patent-leather heels. As she walked, her hips swayed tantalisingly. Overall, she looked impossibly hot.

One look and Darcy almost swallowed her tongue.

Her reaction must have been pretty obvious, because Natalie was smiling as she joined Darcy outside the restaurant.

“You look nice,” she told Darcy.

“You too,” Darcy blurted, feeling inexplicably nervous. “Really lovely. Gorgeous. Um.” She swallowed, her mouth and throat feeling dry.

Natalie only smiled, looking faintly amused at Darcy’s sudden inability to speak full sentences.

“Shall we go in?” she asked Darcy.

“Sure,” Darcy nodded. “We should do that.”

“Ladies,” the maitre’d greeted them as they entered the restaurant. “Do you have a booking?”

“Booking for two, under Petrova,” Natalie told him. She and Darcy were shown to a table, and sat down.

Natalie immediately began to peruse the menu, so Darcy did the same.

It was a good thing that Darcy had been saving, because wow. The food here was _expensive_. Screw the cost, though – it was totally worth it to get the chance to spend an evening with Natalie, especially when she looked so amazing.

“So, do you come here often?” Darcy asked, after a couple of minutes. Natalie gave her a _seriously? You’re using that old cliché?_ look, and Darcy shrugged, with a slight grin.

“Sometimes,” Natalie allowed.

“So, Petrova is a Russian name,” Darcy went on. “Female form of Petrov, am I right? Does that mean you’re Russian?”

Natalie shrugged.

“I grew up in Russia,” she said, although there was no hint of a Russian accent in her voice. “Emigrated as soon as I was old enough. Russia wasn’t a good place for a young girl to grow up.” Her tone was guarded enough that Darcy took it as a cue not to ask.

“Wow, I never would have guessed from your accent,” Darcy said instead. “You sound totally American.”

“I wanted to blend in.” Natalie smiled faintly, as though at some inside joke, and put on a heavy Russian accent. “ _You talk like this, everyone thinks, 'aha, a Russian spy,' yes?_ ” Natalie lost the accent, regaining her American tones. “What I wanted was for everyone to think I was just another girl on the street.”

“With that hair?” Darcy said with a snort. “Please, you stand out like anything. Imagine if you really were a spy, you’d have so much trouble blending in.”

Natalie smirked.

“Oh, it’s be less trouble that you think. Wear a wig, insert cheek pads to make the face look fatter, pick out shapeless, bulky clothes – no one would give me a second glance.”

Darcy tried to imagine Natalie with a wig, a rounder face and no figure. She totally failed.

“I find it interesting yet slightly worrying that you know that,” she told Natalie. “Do you read Modesty Blaise novels, or something?”

Natalie’s brow furrowed.

“Modesty Blaise?”

“It’s this awesome series about a female retired criminal mastermind who gets bored of retirement and does jobs for MI6 on the side,” Darcy explained. “Sort of like a female James Bond, but the realistic book version of Bond, not the ridiculous movie versions.”

Natalie’s eyebrows lifted.

“I’ll have to make a note of it.”

One of the wait staff came over to take their orders, so Darcy went for a duck dish that sounded nice, while Natalie ordered a seafood dish.


End file.
